As I sit here at the computer, one of the nicest things is that my back is to everything else in my home. By staring at my monitor, I can’t see the toys littering the floor, the unmade beds, the Amazon shipping boxes strewn across the living room, the decorations and presents piled on my kitchen table for a church Christmas dinner, or the precariously perched boxes in the garage where the ornaments and lights wait for me to pull them out and decorate.
When you’re busy, everything demands your time at once, right? For my personal record, when I look back at this day, here’s what I’ve been attempting to accomplish:
- Writing social media content for some small businesses
- Editing a personal essay/memoir for a writing contest due tomorrow
- Planning and prepping for the Christmas Relief Society dinner tomorrow
- Sending checks to musicians that played for the Trans Siberian Orchestra pit stop in Salt Lake
- Skyping with a writer for another contract doing technical writing work
- Writing on this blog and finishing a short piece for my website
- Changing diapers
- Loving children
- Playing in the snow
- Piano lessons with Dom (he asked for it!)
- Potty training with Gabbi (she told me today she had pooped, one step in the right direction of communicating it, even if after the fact!!)
- Washing diapers
- Ignoring it all by turning on Christmas music and dancing amidst the empty shipping boxes
When I was working full time, I envisioned my future as a SAHM and it included joyful play dates, trips to the gym, a clean house, and some extra cash from a little writing here and there during naps.
Turns out, this full-time mom gig is killer. And I only have two lives to protect and serve!
Years ago, I had started a new job and felt nervous about the impending learning curve. A friend with a successful career counseled me not to worry about it because good coworkers and bosses understand that challenging positions require a 6-12 month learning curve. I needed that curve for the position I had just started.
I am here to tell you, people, that the mom learning curve is EXTREME! My goodness. As soon as I think that I may be getting good at something, my kid changes on me. And then there’s the sleep. Listen, child of mine: I have no clue why you’re crying in the middle of the night. Of course, if I go in to your room, you will sit up and instantly ask for milk. Okay. So you’re awake because you think you need milk. Well, what about my needs, little miss? Maybe I need some milk, but I swear, when I ingest excessive amounts of creamy, delicious dairy, my face will get angry with me and respond with red, bumpy fury. And now, I’ve gone off on a tangent about adult acne. I really just wanted to tell you about how this mom job I do is the hardest thing I’ve ever done. Every day, I am challenged and rarely do I feel like I succeed. It’s easy to picture other mom friends sitting at home in spotless homes where their cupboards are organized and alphabetized, with the bulgur wheat on the shelf above the quinoa; the laundry sits folded in each drawer; there aren’t crayon marks on the TV; the only thing on their piano is one piece of music (not torn); their kitchens floors aren’t crumby; and they already have their stunning Christmas decorations up. Right? Isn’t that what your homes are like, my mom friends?
I totally succeeded today, though. Here’s why:
- Dom smiled the ENTIRE time he was at the pool for swimming lessons.
- I accurately tracked my writing time for my hourly contract.
- Gabbi took two naps and both were in her crib.
- Gabbi told me the coh (coat), pa (pants), and shoooo (shoes) she wanted to wear.
- I put them on her even though they didn’t match.
- We bundled up and went for a walk outside in the snow.
- We ate enchiladas, rice and beans for dinner.
- We finished that with a variety of cookies from Cutler’s.
- I sat down and finished this blog.