Mormons: A Talented, Peculiar People

I found this random list in a sketchbook I scribbled in my freshman year at BYU. For this entry, I remember writing it while sitting in one of the desks at the back of the lecture room in the Joseph Knight Humanities Building where my student ward held sacrament meeting. I was sitting next to my roommate, Ruth, and we put this list together. What do you think? Did I miss something important that we Mormons are good at?

Sunday, November 12th, 2000

Things Mormons do best: folding chairs, eating bread, crying, singing the melody, lowering & rising pulpits, drawing on programs, resting their heads on the row in front, never sliding to the middle of the row, graciously leaving with screaming kids, making jello, trading in station wagons for suburbans, reading First Nephi, trying to start their talk with a joke, showing off a clever tie, arranging flowers, always having tissues on hand, praying to find their missing sock, braiding up 12-year old girls’ hair in corn rows, reciting Articles of Faith, praying for 5 minutes at the end of a too-long meeting, eating cheerios while sitting on padded benches

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6 comments

  1. Ncmo, dtr, dumping friends, being white, cheap, claiming to love a body of associates, over rating byu football, MLM, blogging,

    Sorry to sound so negative, but you got all the positive ones.

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  2. How ’bout having “lovely decor” for RS mtgs? and then there’s the ever present refreshments for everything but Sacrament mtg….. I’ve talked to a bishop or two who wanted to be released just so they could get called to Nursery so they could have legal snacks lol…. love it!

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  3. Mormons are good at having meetings. Lots and lots of meetings. Especially on the stake level. Meetings about future meetings. Meetings to recap past meetings.

    Too. Many. Meetings.

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  4. @grandma – mmmmmmm, obituary pie!

    @kaakun – I definitely should have included MLM… ncmo, not so much, seriously

    @morgan – starting over and trying again, I like that

    @genene – why don’t we have sacrament meeting snacks? that would really help me better than a “rest hymn”

    @shannon – sooooooooooooo many meetings, tis true

    Like

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