Climbing My Mountains, One Snooze Button At A Time

It’s been just over five years since I wrote this journal entry and it’s crazy to think of all of the changes in my life since then. There have been lots and there are more to come, even in the near future. It’s good to know that we can continue to change ourselves for the better, becoming happier, more aware of other people, harder workers, and even understand ourselves a little more. Some things, on the other hand, don’t change—like actually hanging up clothes right out of the dryer.


9/15/2005

I’ve been reading a book called Emotional Intelligence and as I read in the chapter titled, “Managing Melancholy,” last night, I noticed that I was relating a little too well to the subject matter. In the past several days, I was allowing myself to sit around in a sad state of despondency. However, I didn’t realize what I had fallen into until I realized I was reading about myself in this book. Initially, the author wrote about strategies to get over melancholy that don’t work, although many people try them. First, it talked about “simply staying alone.” However, I would like to blame my recent loneliness on the recent failure of my phone’s text messaging abilities. I’m sure that’s why I had no choice, but to hang out at home with my sister’s cat. Next, the poor strategy was ruminating—specifically, “focusing on some aspect of the depression itself—how tired we feel, how little energy or motivation we have…” My thoughts as I read this, “Oh, I totally agree. I just feel like blah.” All week, I had intentions to go to the gym. (Except for Monday night—let’s be honest—I counted soccer as my workout.) I never even made it so far as to get into gym clothes. “Maybe later” is my greatest argument. Continuing the ruminating topic, the author includes that the thoughts are not accompanied by “any concrete course of action that might alleviate the problem.” Sitting on the leather couch, mindlessly switching TV stations wasn’t alleviating my unnameable boredom? That’s no good; because I really didn’t want to do anything about it except pronounce how bored I was. As I read, I eventually came to the section: “Mood Lifters” and was determined to follow the directions. I write to you today to tell you that I did it. I followed the strategy of “positive alternatives,” and “engineer[ed] a small triumph or easy success.” Today, after work, I cleaned up my room. That mostly consisted of hanging my laundry that has been wrinkling in a basket for the last week and organizing some financial records into a binder (although they weren’t going anywhere in their neat pile on the floor). Although more tidying up then cleaning, this was my small triumph, which I followed with a positive alternative at the gym. My next small triumph: getting up tomorrow morning—climbing my mountains one snooze button at a time.

2 thoughts on “Climbing My Mountains, One Snooze Button At A Time

  1. Lauren! I’m a fan of your consciousness.

    It was how many years ago I was very excited to hear you think aloud in your living room some late Sunday? Emotional Intelligence. Good Gosh. Still, this is your inner science, your study, no? I remember telling you smugly how emotionally intelligent I thought I was. Ha! I want to take it all back. I wish I was as bold the inner inquirer you are.

    Like

  2. I agree with Morgan. Well said…. “I am a fan of your consciousness.” This was a great post for me to find today. I’m in a place where all I want to do is pronounce how bored I am. It’s a VAST place right now, I’m swimming in an ocean of it, a lifetime of it and all my past “weaknesses” are jumping up & clamoring for attention, acting as though I’d never acknowledged them or conquered them. I’m beginning to wonder if I EVER will actually conquer them or am I supposed to deal with them as best I can until I’ve endured or dealt to the end?

    Well, that got way too serious. I was just so happy to read your fabulous post & feel a spark jump to life inside me when I read of your decision to follow the instructions & then achieve your small triumph! Thanks for the inspiration today, glad I found it on your blog.

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