Episode 64: I’m Doomed to Be Fat and I Blame My Chair

According to the NYTimes, because I sit all day at work, I’m DOOMED.

(echo) doooooooomed

Don’t believe me? Check out their article: “Stand Up While You Read This!

Here’s what I learned from it:

Sitting is TERRIBLE

I thought it just made my back hurt, but sitting is really bad for you. Maybe even worse than smoking, saturated fats, and bacon. For one thing, it’s really passive. If I were to at least chew gum while sitting, I might burn some calories.

Sitting also makes me suck at burning fat. Blame lipoprotein lipase. If we pick apart the Latin to understand what that is, we learn that it means the more I watch TV, the more chance I will look like Roseanne Barr. We did go to the same high school, after all. When I sit, my metabolism slows down. Lazy metabolism.

All my excessive exercising just doesn’t cut it

Okay, so I exercise almost every day between lifting weights and playing sports (except for when I hurt my knee a wee bit and “get” to take a break). And then I sleep for eight hours*. That leaves FIFTEEN LONG HOURS of other activities. How many of those are spent sitting? Probably 14.5. The other half is spent walking through the parking lot. Man, I AM LAZY. Guess I can’t blame my metabolism.

Still, don’t give up hope

It’s not too late, though. All I have to do is stop taking the elevator. Or I could get up and go ask people questions instead of emailing them.**I can NOT miss my abs/core breaks in our wellness center anymore. And when I get home from work, no sitting on the couch watching TV with the laptop in my lap. Good thing I’m done with my graduate degree.

Does somebody want to buy me a standup desk for my laptop?


*Technically, I never actually sleep for that long, but I’m in bed for that long, or try to be.

**I work in IT, though, so this personal interaction could scare some people.

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