Bring on this week’s fabulous installment of Therapy Thursdays where Larrie gets her much-needed therapy from the Doc (hey… imaginary therapy works, too, and costs less).
DOC: You made it; would you like to discuss what everybody else is discussing?
LRE: Who’s everybody else?
DOC: Yaknow, all of my patients.
LRE: Unless you’re scheduling therapy sessions with all my other personalities without telling the main me, you don’t have any other patients.
DOC: Well, if I did, they’d all be living in fear because of the economy.
LRE: Oo, no, let’s not talk about that. There’s too MUCH to say.
DOC: So you think this blog would be too long if we went down that path of discussion?
LRE: More like a path of destruction and definitely, yes, it would be too long. Here’s a great link for the best economic blog, in my not-so-humble opinion. We’ll leave it at that.
DOC: Gotcha… one of those underlined things. Okay, then let’s talk about something else F-U-N.
LRE: Oh yeah? What have ya got in mind there, Doc?
DOC: Dating, of course.
LRE: Oh, how super.
DOC: I did some research… well, basically I clicked on one of those blue underlined things from MSN’s homepage and came across some interesting little facts about love.
LRE: Oh good, love.
DOC: Yes, should make for an interesting conversation.
LRE: All conversations in my head are interesting. Okay then, Doc—bring it.
DOC: So, scanning over this list… oh here we go. Here’s something talking about office romances and it says, “the single biggest predictor of love is proximity.”
LRE: Oh that’s a very true statement.
DOC: Oh yeah? Got something juicy to share from work?
LRE: Not exactly, but the statement about proximity, I think, is very true.
DOC: Well, duh, that’s a given.
LRE: Yeah, apparently, even some guy living in Phoenix is too far away for much of a relationship.
DOC: Plus, who would want to live in Phoenix?
DOC: So no office romances?
LRE: Not that I’m going to tell my imaginary doctor, but Stacky and I do have a good time discussing romances in general and coming up with nicknames for the lucky men who take me out.
DOC: Oh, now we’re getting somewhere interesting… nicknames, huh? Let’s discuss…
LRE: Yeah, there’s some good ones, but it’s hard to keep track.
DOC: Ha, I bet… stop being so facetious and share a nickname or two already.
LRE: All right; there are the good rhyming ones like “Shuttle Boy Toy Troy.”
DOC: Oh yeah, that is a good one.
LRE: Yep. And then there’s odd ones which really make fun of our nerdiness for working where we work.
DOC: Huh? Didn’t follow that one.
LRE: Well, see, that guy in Phoenix area, we called him Milk Protein.
DOC: Yeah, I definitely don’t follow.
LRE: It’s because we have a test here for an allergen to the protein in dairy products… called casein. Anyway, Phoenix’s name was similar to that so we, of course, called him Milk Protein.
DOC: And did he have a milk moustache and did he turn his head to the right when you kissed?
LRE: Yes and mostly.
DOC: So, other nicknames?
LRE: Of course, there are plenty, but two is good enough for now.
DOC: Fine; don’t share.
LRE: Fine; I won’t.
DOC: Oh, come on, please?
LRE: You’re begging? Fine, I’ll just throw out a few more: SU (for stood up), UFSteve, and TBBF (for to-be boyfriend). There ya go. Anything else from your FASCINATING MSN article?
DOC: Thank you for sharing and yes… here’s one. Says that 11% of women have researched a guy online. Have you?
LRE: But of course. I’m surprised that number is so low.
DOC: So anything interesting from that research?
LRE: No; sorry.
DOC: Oh, thought that would be a good question. Hmm, let’s see if there’s one more good one.
LRE: Yes, let’s.
DOC: Here’s one… it says that after you get dumped, you love the person even more… for a time.
DOC: Because the “brain regions that lit up when we were in a happy union continue to be active.”
LRE: Oh, okay. That makes sense then.
DOC: How so?
LRE: Well, I was thinking about how quickly I got over one certain relationship a wee bit ago.
DOC: How quick?
LRE: Really quick… like one day quick.
DOC: So then how does that make sense?
LRE: Because it refers to being in a happy union.
DOC: Oh, well then… good thing that relationship is over then.
DOC: What was his nickname?
LRE: Don’t worry about it.