Here it is: this week’s installment of Larrie’s weekly visit with the good Doc; you wait all week for it, don’t you? Unless you’re Kaakun, then when you see this entry, you realize that it’s still not Friday. Talk about a bummer. Sure, let’s talk about it. The doctor is in.
LRE: Hey Doc, I got nothing.
DOC: Um, hi to you and that’s a strange greeting.
LRE: I know, right? But seriously, I don’t have a suggestion for our conversation this week.
DOC: Well that’s why I get paid the big bucks, right?
LRE: You don’t get paid; you don’t exist.
DOC: Ouch, that hurts.
LRE: Did you want to talk about it?
DOC: Maybe. I spend all my time listening to other people talk and go on and on about problems, but nobody cares about what I’ve been dealing with lately.
LRE: Um, who else are you talking to?
DOC: Probably just your other personalities.
LRE: I think I would still know about that, though.
DOC: Not if you’re on Ambien.
LRE: True, but that’s been a long time and since I no longer have roommates to go find me next door and bring me home, I definitely wouldn’t risk it again.
DOC: So stay off of that one, eh? What doctor prescribed it?
LRE: Like I can remember. It might have been when I was too old to be on my parents’ insurance anymore and the student insurance at school sucked rocks so I went through unofficial channels to get meds without a doctor’s visit.
DOC: Gasp, don’t tell me.
LRE: Um, did you just SAY gasp instead of actually gasping?
DOC: Why yes, yes I did.
LRE: Right.
DOC: At least you had insurance, just in case.
LRE: True and now I probably totally take my benefits at work for granted. I had a free clinic visit today to burn off some tiny little bumps on my knee.
DOC: Free?
LRE: Free. And all I did was talk a short break from work to walk downstairs to our employee health clinic.
DOC: And at this point, I’m really tempted to take this conversation and wander down the road to the let’s-talk-about-universal-health-care pit stop.
LRE: No. No you’re not.
DOC: Ah, why not?
LRE: Because mister imaginary doctor, I have excessively strong opinions on this matter and I really don’t want to ruin our friendship.
DOC: Don’t you have friends with different political views than you?
LRE: Yes. We don’t really talk about it.
DOC: What if I have the SAME views as you?
LRE: Well, seeing as how you’re MY imaginary doctor, that is probably the case, but it’s just not a chance I am willing to take.
DOC: Sigh.
LRE: Now you’re saying sigh instead of sighing? Well… whatever rolls your kayak.
DOC: So no talking about it, huh?
LRE: I can give you a link to a good story if ya’d like, but that’s the best I can offer.
DOC: Yes, please. Link away.
LRE: Right: American Health Care in Critical Condition.
DOC: Thanks.
LRE: Yep. And, I’m just curious: did you know that our little visit this week would end up on this topic?
DOC: Nope; you’re the one who wrote it; you’re in charge.
LRE: Weird.